The Adventure Ends

Alex and Scott arrived home yesterday evening safe and sound. It is great to be reunited with "Momma" for both of us. Alex remembered Lara and immediately called her "Momma". Scott felt that "Momma" was a sight for sore eyes. When we pulled into the driveway, Alex said "dome" (Russian for "home") recognizing the house that we had shown him in the photo album throughout the time we spent with him in the Ukraine.

Alex did really well at home last night. We had a late dinner, he explored the house, played with the dogs, and slept through the night. We woke up to snow in the morning. He seems to be right back on schedule today. It feels great to have him in the house! We find ourselves just staring at him as he tools around playing and talking. We can't believe he is actually here with us. It has been soooooo long coming.

Alex was a trooper on the flight from Amsterdam. He slept half the way and spent the other half eating, watching movies and doing puzzles. The logistics of checking in for the flight and getting through passport control in Kyiv was an adventure not worth reviewing at this point. It is enough to say it is good to be home.

So, was it all worth it? We have contemplated this question over the last two months. With focus on the end game of meeting and adopting Alex, the answer to this question is ABSOLUTELY. We are very fortunate that we were able to persevere through the unknown in order to find him. We are doubly blessed that he is in such good health and normal in every way. A friend reminded us that there is a reason that everything happens. There is a reason Russia shut down their adoptions to the U.S. during our adoption process and we had to redirect our efforts to the Ukraine. There is a reason we were not exposed to all the information about the process in Ukraine prior to leaving. There is a reason there were obstacles and difficulties throughout the process right to the end. There were reasons for our first two appointments. Yes, we feel extremely fortunate. We were on the razors edge of coming home empty handed. An hour here or an hour there and the outcome of our process could have become very different. Alex was visited by a Ukrainian couple the week prior to us learning about him, but they turned him down for adoption. Their decision made him available for international adoption and available for us to meet. We know of four other couples that had appointments and in Kyiv at the same time that returned to the U.S. without a child. It feels like we were handed the winning lottery ticket.

A better question to ponder is: "Would you do it all again the same way?". If we knew we would get Alex, ABSOLUTELY. When we were at the Baby House with Alex , we saw many wonderful young children. At the time, the Baby House had 128 children 0-4 years of age. It remains difficult for us to comprehend these numbers when we know some couples leave the Ukraine without a child and others wait for months to simply receive an invitation. We understand adopting in the Ukraine is not a guarantee after traveling there and leaves an awful lot to chance. For those who may be reading this and considering adoption in the Ukraine, we wish you a happy ending such as ours and hope our blog may provide some additional insight. It is a difficult process and people should fully weigh the risks and rewards of attempting the Ukrainian adoption process, there are many young children with no major/minor medical issues in their baby houses where their only issue is they don't have a family. We strongly hope the bureaucracy continues to advance and streamline in the best interest of all orphaned children.

In the end, we are now in a very happy place. This blog was not meant to carry on forever, so this is the final entry. We want to thank everyone who helped us and supported us to get to the Ukraine, took care of our home front while we were gone, and everyone who followed our story and provided us with so much moral support. You can not know how much all of the messages of support kept us going and kept us hoping while in the Ukraine. Family, friends, the companies for which we work, and our physicians (including Clarke and Sarah). You all pitched in and were as much a part of bringing Alex to us as any individual effort that Lara and I did as a couple. A collective group can move mountains, while individuals can only move mounds. It took a team to get all of this done, and you were all a part of the greater team effort. One team member that we have not mentioned by name is our coordinator and translator in the Ukraine, Era. Era took care of us while in Ukraine in every way and facilitated our process. We can not imagine being in Ukraine without her. She did not simply translate. She managed all of the legal and bureaucratic processes we faced. Most importantly, we always felt that we had someone there in the country that cared about us, ensuring our needs were taken care of and working extremely hard to help fulfil our dreams. We became friends, having spent two months together sharing our difficulties, dreams, philosophies and cultures. Saying goodbye at the airport was very difficult. Hopefully it will be more of a farewell and our paths will cross again (next time, Scott will make the Borscht).

So with that, this concludes the blog. Hope you enjoyed reading it as much as we enjoyed creating it. We are happy to say that while this is the end of this adventure, it is the beginning of the next!

We're Heading Home for America

Alex and I are back in Kyiv as of Tuesday. It has been a long time since I posted anything of significance so I thought I would write about the process of finalizing custody, getting the birth certificate, obtaining a Ukrainian passport, traveling back to Kyiv and finally getting Alex's U.S. Visa. I also updated the "Photo Log", which the link to is on the right, with a lot of new photos. Read on if interested in the adventures, but the bottom line is that as of yesterday (Wednesday) Alex has a U.S. Visa and when we touch down in Minneapolis he will be officially a citizen of the United States of America!

As you know, the end of the 10 day waiting period was on the 15th. A rational person would think that from there it is a matter of simply getting some paper work finalized (which as you already know was a mountain's worth) and picking up Alex..... WRONG. The following is a real account of what happened when we finished the waiting period and woke up on that Tuesday morning.

Tuesday, April 15th: I met the coordinator and driver at 9:00 a.m. We went to the court house to pick up final decree. Got another draft of the final and then went to get 10 copies notarized. We then headed to our next stop which was the town of Bakhchysaray where Alex was born. When we called ahead to let them know we were on the way, the person in the Vital Records authority said that we needed something additional in the decree that was not there. They wanted a statement of our marriage date which was in the official marriage license provided. Apparently this is not usual. We had to then turn around and go back to the court house and beg the judge to change the decree. When we spoke to him he seemed irritated at this person who wanted this change. The decree is written from an official template so it has been used for years. He said some not so nice things about these people and told us to wait. Our coordinator called the office in Kyiv and spoke with the person she knows there and they said we did not need it either. Then after a few more calls and an hour burned in the court house, the person in the Bakhchysaray Vital Records office (VRO) decided to let it slide. One thing you should note is that everybody here seems to make up the process at they go along. Then we drove 40 minutes to Bakhchysaray. When we got to the VRO, we had to go behind the building and up some rickety old stairs to enter. When we got there, we were told we would have to wait because the power was out. Two hours passed and we had a nice lunch (really good middle eastern) at the establishment next door.

Side note on Bakhchysaray: This town is not where Alex is "from". It is where he was born. This town is the old capital where the Khan for the region ruled. There is an old Turkish style palace that is still in tact and a popular attraction.

We received a phone call and this was our signal that the power was on and to return. They had some papers for me to sign and we received a new birth certificate with Alex's new full name, an adoption certificate with the new name and a copy of his personal ID number (like our Social Security number). We then left and drove back to Simferopol to get the Ukrainian passport process started and change his ID number. With the birth certificate in hand, we went to two passport offices and also a bank to make the official government payment for the passport. After that we went to another office which was about to close and got a woman to help us to change his ID number to reflect his new name. It was the end of the day and she was kind enough to help us so we were able to get this done. There were some other stops in there to make copies, get notarizations. By the time all of this was complete, it was 6:00 and too late to get the final paperwork done at the orphanage to pick up Alex. Alex would have to wait another day.

Wednesday, April 16th: Much of this is running together, but we first went to another passport related office. Then we went to several banks to try to make the official government payments and get a receipt. The third bank decided to help us and took the payment. Then we went to pick up Alex and take him to get a passport photo at the passport office. This is where the trouble started. We were supposed to be at the office by 11:00 a.m. but with all the stops we had to make to get the payment done, we were late. The woman who ran things there, got really irate and we had to beg. Then when she allowed us into the building (you have to wait outside) she made Alex cry with what she was saying. We sat Alex in front of the camera, got him to settle down, and they snapped the photo. She then informed us that she would take the full week allowed to process the passport! I do not have kind words for her as you can imagine, but held my tongue. This process usually only takes two or three days. She had us over a barrel and knew it. Let's just say she was corrupt and would require an "expediting fee". Basically, she kicked us out after that. The possibility of returning to Kyiv in time to make our flight was held in the palms of this person's hands. Bummer. We had no idea what to expect. We returned with Alex and dropped him off for his lunch and nap. We then did the paperwork necessary to take him from the orphanage. We received our "get out of the baby house" card and took our coordinator to the train station. She wanted to go back to Kyiv to try to facilitate the process back there. My driver and I went to get a photo for the orphanage's records developed from my camera. Then we went back around 4:00 to pick up Alex. No problems with the orphanage. The care takers are really great people who seem to care a lot about these kids. They took off his clothes, I put on his new ones and off we went! Just in time for dinner.

After that, the passport office in Kyiv sent their end of the passport paperwork via train on Friday night to Simferopol. We were told by the old battle axe to call at noon on Monday. At noon, she told us to be there at 5:00. Before that, my driver took me to the train station to get our tickets for the train to Kyiv. We were at the passport office 40 minutes early. The woman came out a little early (my coordinator was not there but had given me instructions) and waved me in. She was pleasant this time, gave me the passport. It all checked out OK. I left the building and headed to the train station with Alex for our 6:30 train.

The train ride was nice. Alex had not taken a nap, so he was tired. We booked a first class birth for the two of us. Much more comfortable with better bathrooms and amenities. Alex really enjoyed looking out the windows and bouncing around. He fell asleep (passed out) around 8:00 and did not wake up until 7:00 the next morning. Photos are in the photo log.

Back in Kyiv 17 hours later at 11:30 in the morning, we went directly to the hospital to have the required physical done on Alex. The doctor said he was in great shape and did not display any of the delay kids can have that come from these institutions. I could have told her that myself, but was glad to get a professional opinion from someone who meets a lot of these kids. That only took 45 minutes, so we went to the U.S. Embassy to get the ball rolling on the visa. Did some paperwork, paid my $400 and that was it for the day. We were told to come back the next day at 2:00 for the "interview" (which turned out to be nothing) and pick up the visa. The next day it took longer to get to the embassy than to do the interview and get the visa.

One more day and we will be on a flight and back in the U.S.A.!

Introducing Alex!

This was our first day meeting Alex:

Later Photo:
The day before Lara left for Kyiv and home:

Last Day of the Waiting Period

Today is the last day of the official waiting period. Tomorrow (Tuesday) we will go back to court to sign some more papers and get the final decree and permission to take custody of Alex. If all goes as planned, I will be picking up Alex at the end of the day and taking him to the apartment for his first night away from the baby house. I am very excited to get on with everything and have Alex with me full time. In addition to court, we will need to drive to the small town where Alex is from in order to get his new birth certificate. This birth certificate will have his new name (Alexander Scott) and have our names as the parents. Once we obtain the birth certificate, then we can go to the passport agency on Wednesday and apply for his Ukrainian passport. It will take a few days to get the passport so we will be in Simferopol through the end of the week or Monday. I am very anxious to get back to Kyiv and finalize everything so we can go home.

Yesterday afternoon, Alex and I went outside and ran around together. Had fun. Played ball, found some new bugs (ants and a box elder beetle). Before the crowd came, we whistled at the birds and learned the word "bird". He wants to call them "ipka" which is fish. He laughed because I would mimic the bird's call, and the bird would do it and then I would... etc. He thought that was a hoot and tried whistling at the birds as well.

Went shopping at the central market which is a huge outdoor market where all of Simferopol turns out to buy any and every manner of goods. A beautiful day. Warm and sunny. The place was packed! Lots of fun people watching and shopping. I bought Alex a pair of jeans, a shirt, and a pair of PJ's for about 100 Hrv ($20). Then came the big find..... a new training potty for Alex! Cost 11 Hrv ($2.10). A steal! It is a little one with a lid. I figured for the price, I would buy it and use it while in the Ukrain. I will throw it out before I come home. Alex can use it to eliminate some of the stress of transitioning from the bucket he uses at the baby house to the full size toilet. You read about these stresses, but don't know if it will be a big deal for him. For the price, what the heck. Someone can use it as a planter.

Headed this afternoon to stock the refrigerator for Alex's arrival. Once Alex is with me, I will probably not have as much of an opportunity to post until back in Kyiv where I will hopefully have internet access in my apartment. The next post will be photos of Alex.

Yalta

(NOTE: The photos are small, but you can click on them to enlarge them.)

On Saturday, I made the trip to Yalta with our new friends from Spain. Fernando and Elisa were kind enough to invite me along with them on their excursion. They are here adopting a little boy from the Fern Tree Baby House. They know a little English so we are able to communicate. This morning we discussed it and I think that we were all exhausted at the end of the day working through the language barrier. They as well as I went to be early after dinner Saturday night.

The sunny, warm weather held up and it was perfect day for a drive to the coast to see some sights. I did not expect to get out of Simferopol while in Kryme and with the routine I am now in with Alex, but I have to admit that it was good to get away for a day and see something different. We left around 9:45 A.M. and headed south toward Alushta on the coast. Our plan was to drive up the coast from there to Yalta and then to Sepastopol and back north to Simferopol. We never made it that far. We spent so much time walking in Yalta and seeing sights that we did not make it past Yalta. We were not disappointed.

During the drive, we climbed over the mountain range to the south of Simferopol. The landscape changes quickly as you drive out of town. The mountain range reminds me of the mountain range that lies along the northwest coast of Italy. It rises quickly as you drive toward the coast and then falls into the sea. The towns along the cost all all nestled into the mountain side and foot hills as they slope into the coast. Very pretty. These mountains were high enough to still have snow on their peaks which was surprising to us. The mountains are heavily wooded and this forest is the first large forested area I have seen since being in Ukraine. Apparently these forests are owned by the government and are now protected.

As we crested the range and headed down toward the coast, the first thing that becomes apparent is that the southern side of the range is the wine growing region of Kryme. Below the forests, large vineyards take up the majority of the landscape above the coastal areas. I have sampled the wine here and most of it would not be to our taste (Scott and Lara's). Most of the wine produced in Ukraine is very sweet. I have only found one dry wine from Kryme (which I liked).

After reaching the coast we headed west towards Yalta. The total drive to Yalta was about an hour and a half. We stopped along the way and took in some of the views along the highway taking our time. The first stop was to go to Yalta proper and walk along the harbor. This is where all the cruise ships dock. We put our toes in the Black Sea (very cold) so we could say we did that, had lunch and walked a little more. Like every town in the Ukraine, Yalta has a very nice statue of Lenin in the town center. Yalta is no different. And, like most statues of Lenin, this one overlooked such bastions of capitalism like an amusement part, McDonald's and high end shopping. I guess the Soviets only put Lenin statues in the best locations (location, location, location!), which have now become..... the best post communist locations! Find a statue of Lenin, and this is where you want to buy real estate. I think that this might just be the hottest real estate idea I have ever had.

After the harbor we drove up the mountain and further west to see the Swallows Nest, which is one of the best known symbols of Kryme. This castle was built in 1912 by the German Baron Stengel (no relation). This is a highly touched up photo of the castle. It hangs on the cliff face over the ocean. Nice pad! It is now a restaurant and the entire area around it is a "sanatorium". It is a large area and no cars are allowed so we did not go in.

A sanatorium is a place for people to go who are sick (not necessarily mentally ill). There are many along the coast. Apparently, the Russians used to be sent to these places when they were ill. It would be a nice prescription to get. The views are breathtaking. Now a days, these sanatoriums are largely unfilled and unused. Biggest waist of prime real estate outside of golf courses (sorry Norman).

We then went to a park that also had a castle. Sorry, I cant remember the name of the castle, but it was nice. One side was European style and the other side was middle eastern style (ocean side). Great views of Yalta and the sea.

Then we went to the palace of Nicholas II, Czar of Russia. This is where the Yalta conference was held after WWII. This is a very historical place where Stalin, Churchill and Roosevelt met to decide the post war direction of the world. It was also interesting to see how the last Russian Czar and his family spent their summers. I was actually a little disappointed. When you go to a palace you expect some grand architecture and over-the-top decor. This palace was nothing of the sort. More like a really big, nice house. Perhaps the decor was stripped out by the Nazis or the Soviets. Don't know. Could not understand the history from what I could read in the rooms. Additionally, there were no paintings (or very few). Nicholas was much more into the new art of photography and motion pictures. The walls were lined with many photos of his family and his life at the palace. These were extremely interesting. While it appears that perhaps they lived a simpler life while in Yalta, the photos reinforced the truth that it is good to be the king!
(Qualifying statement: It is "good to be the king" so long as you do not have millions of poor, starving people within your dominion being led by an ideology to turn your kingdom on its head, free the people from their bondage and redistribute the wealth. Nicholas and Louis would have been better off if they had read Sun Tzu's "The Art of War" (it was around) and headed the advice to always "feed the people so that they never hunger". Will aristocracy ever learn... sorry, too late. Nicholas II (and Louis) were executed.)

After Nicholas' palace, we headed home. We were all very tired after a good, long day. Thank you Fernando and Elisa!

Yalta Delayed, A Banana Fiend Emerges, Four More Days

Apparently it was raining at the coast today, so we have delayed our Yalta day trip until Saturday. There are now four more days until the waiting period of done!

Alex and I had a wonderful morning together. It was nice enough outside to go out, but the play room was open and thought I would try to get a little one on one quality time with him. He seemed to like being inside today. When he is outside he runs away constantly with me chasing after him yelling "Alex! Alex!, Ne nada! Ne nada!" The Italians love watching this spectacle. There is just too many distractions to get in some serious bonding time. Splitting the day may be a better idea in order for him to get socialization and for us to get one on one time.

Alex has become the banana fiend. I bring one every day in the morning and he now goes in search of them when we settle into a spot for our visits. "Banana, Banana" he says as he rifles through the bag. He likes to peel them himself, hold it and then devour it. Just starts cramming it in. This morning he also ate the entire box of Animal Crackers, cheese and an apple juice. Glad I brought some food.

Alex and I have been working on his ball throwing technique. I don't think that this is a skill they teach the kids (probably for good reason). When we play with the ball, he tosses it strait up in the air in an under hand fashion. Not effective. No distance. No accuracy. We have been working on throwing overhand and he has caught on quickly. He can now throw a ball across the room, fairly accurately, and he is very excited about his new found talent. I have also started taking the all important slippers Lara bought me in Kyiv when I go to visit. You can not go back into the main groupa area with your street shoes or socks. It is customary in the Ukraine to put on slippers when entering anyone's home. It is bad form to wear your socks or your shoes. This is not all that dissimilar to Minnesota, where we take off our shoes when entering someone's home no matter how dressy the event. By taking my slippers, I can walk back into the groupa area and see Alex on his turf. The care takers seem surprised, but not unwelcoming. They always want an update on when we are headed back to "America". They pull out the calendar and make me explain. (Now that I think of it, it might be because they are anxious to see me leave.)

It is good to be able to take Alex back there to get a toy or take him to use the potty (a small bucket on the floor). We usually have to ask someone to help us. Back in the potty room, I must take a photo of those kids back there using their buckets. It rates a ten for cute factor. At specific times during the day, they put the kids on these little plastic buckets (think beach bucket) in a semi-circle to pee and poo (pecit and kacat). When you go back there, they all look up at you smiling and giggling. It's a hoot. They have to sit there with their legs closed (so everything goes down) with their hands on their thighs. Amazing that they stay in this position for a long period of time. They are not allowed to get up until told to by the care givers. When they stand up, they touch their toes, get a wipe, up goes the pants and their done. I have never seen a more orderly group of two year old children in my life. Lara went back there to look in one time. One of the kids saw her and wanted to go to her. Instead of getting up, the little boy had the presence to scoot that bucket across the floor towards her, butt in position, legs closed, and hand on the thighs. He never broke that position. Now that's skill!

Two more Italian couples have shown up to look at kids. One has been there for two days so I am not sure if it means that they like the child or not. They happen to be visiting one of the younger boys in Alex's groupa. Another couple visited him and decided not to adopt him. I hope this one works out for him this time. He is very cute. It has to be hard on both sides of the equation to visit and not have a good match. Not certain about what happened to the second Italian couple. They were not there today. Keeping my fingers crossed that they were working on the never ending stream of paperwork and approvals this morning.

Norman and Maxine are headed back to Florida on Sunday. They were in Minnesota for a Month! I know they are ready to get back to sunshine and warm weather. We only wish we could have returned with their new grandson earlier and they would have had a chance to meet him before heading out. Thank you Mom and Dad for taking care of the home front! We love you!

If anyone reading this has some news from back home at Lake Sarah or work, please email or comment. Would love to hear from you.

Here's A Teaser

We have received a lot of requests to post a photo of Alex. We have another week before we can do that, but thought I would post a teaser photo that was taken the first day we met him. When we met him, we were taken into the Groupa's play room and were allowed to spend some private time with him. A part of this time was over lunch and we were able to watch him eat his lunch and feed him. This is Lara feeding him for the first time. You only get the rear view, but if the back looks this cute, the front has to be even better!

The weather has been very nice the last couple of days. I am feeling almost 100% again, and Alex and I are spending our time together outside chasing butterflies and picking up rocks. As many of you who know me will understand, I am hoping he becomes an avid outdoorsman and all around nature boy. Lara bought him a game where a small fishing pole and line are connected to a magnet. There are several fish that he can catch with the magnet. This game has been a big hit. A very good sign. I can't wait to get him to the end of the dock, back home on Lake Sarah, pulling in sunnies and crappie. He will love it.

I was invited to go on Friday for a day trip to Yalta with my new friends from Spain. Yalta is on the Black Sea about a two hour drive from Simferopol (go to the maps link). If the weather is good, we'll leave around 10:00 in the morning and come home late in the afternoon/early evening. I will post next on Saturday so you all can check back into the blog on Saturday morning when you wake up.

Dos Vadania!